No Need Of Charm
( Originally Published 1916 )
IN "The Marriage Game," Mrs. Flexner's play, occurs a fine line :
"Unless a woman wants something she has no business to want, she has no need of charm."
No need of charm ! How many a foolish little brain, devoid of understanding, has ship-wrecked things by this unreason!
The silly woman, who exerted all her arts and wiles to draw a suitor, drops her efforts with him become a husband. Her market's made. She has caught her train, is safely aboard, and why run any more?
She gives frank expression to her peevish whims and ailments. She is captious, critical.
She is dowdy at breakfast. She is unkempt and sloppily dressed when they two are alone.
Exert one's self to woo a husband? Why, there are those women who seem to think it's hardly decent.
And right here is the cue for the entrance of "the other woman."
Many a man, too, thinks the game's up when he has haltered and altared the woman of his choice. The excitement of the chase is over. It's "married and done for."
Then if the woman be strongly human, as she generally is, and a bit weak and sensitive, as she often is, marriage breaks down. Possibly—enter "the other man."
People speak of having tried marriage and found it a failure. Most of them have not tried at all. That is the trouble. They didn't "try."
Eternal vigilance is the price of love, as well as of liberty. Success, in marriage also, means keeping everlastingly at it.
To sit down, once married, and expect to be coddled, waited on, served, and pleased, you a king on a throne and your mate your servitor, is rather sure to bring on swift ruin.
There is not one wife in a thousand that could not keep her husband if she would keep working at the job. The wife has a thousand advantages' over the other woman.
And if a husband will only not stop making love he need fear no rival.
Most of the unhappy marriages are due to selfishness plus pure boneheadedness.
The love and devotion of a good woman, and of an honest man, is worth working hard for.
And the beauty of it is that it is the most delightful work in the world, once it gets established as a habit.
You need charm everyday you live.